to discover

your vulnerability 

I would never want to be 

your vulnerability is  

something to discover with care 

and with passion 

your vulnerability is as we both know 

nothing that can be exploited

at least nothing that can be portrayed

with bad intentions. 

Although I can feel your vulnerability

day to day

silence in my heart 

and soul 

a way to come back to day to day 

little things that will never be

there is a suffering of the little things that will never be 

the smile under the covers 

in a rainy afternoon 

the good night kiss 

the touch of your lips 

with my toe, just because it is something I can do, and it can annoy you

the smiles, many types of smiles 

the games to play inside

and outside 

the stories 

the hopes and dreams that hold together your arms inside my arms 

the genuine desire 

the candle that my light would unlight. 

The way I would whisper and scream all of a sudden and the way that the sun would postpone its appearance just to give us one more moment of not being. 

The way I would forget about the world outside, just to reunderstand it differently afterwards.

The way you would stop planning, for a little while. The way you would just be amazed by your impact on my being, on my body, on my soul and the other way around.

The way I would need to disipate. The way you would dissappear, more painful more clear your dissappearance than anything else before. 

little things that happen below the surface, below the yellow lines of day to day.

When you let your soul wonder, where does it take you? 

The little things that can never be. Those hurt as the sun on a red skin, mid day. 

pistrui din trecut

Pe umerii mei sunt mainile mamei mele 

pe umerii mamei sunt urme ale mainilor bunicii 

pe umerii bunicii sunt pistrui

pe care ii gasesc pe chip

cand privesc imaginea din oglinda. 

Pistrui, fiecare cu cate o insemnatate, fiecare cu cate o poveste. 

layers of selfdiscovery

I am self aware 

low maintenance  

high achiever 

modest and sometimes single minded

I am the way God intended 

or the universe, or the nothingNess

we care nothing about. 

I am an idealist 

a maker of dreams, 

of objectives to be reached 

and of stairs to reach them. 

I am in all ways a woman 

of many layers:

Beautiful somedays

kind in many ways 

smart, but not smartest

passionate 

contemplative and obsevative 

loyal, but not against my feelings 

straightforward, but still with a diplomatic iz. 

brave.

playful 

and sometimes anxious and 

hardworker

Confident 

and sometimes not.

I lack empathy when I feel lied to, 

crossed with, or I know secret interests residing inside

I am

a mother 

a sister 

a partner

and a daughter 

a friend that would always help a friend in need

a loving woman of many layers. 

out of order

most times in my mind one thought resides

what is it that gives me purpose? 

not only physically. not even only intellectually. 

what is it that I need to learn from the last period? 

not to trust so much my intuition, 

as my perceived feelings seem to be out of order.

Icar

In between looking for me 

and staying away

in between wanting to be close and

taking as much space as possible

in between curiosity, connection or something else. 

As I am.

In between what I have built, that I would never give away and a feeling I have not yet fully understood it's reason to be. 

in between middle day and sunset 

there is a light that caresses the earth for those who know the story of Icarus