first feather

on your back 

uncolored nails tickle a feather   

with many shades 

The truth

that never surrenders, knows no limits, the scary truth, the one that gets you to the sides of society, the truth that takes no blame and has no morals. 

the feather is soft and colourful, many times you feel it just like in a dream, it draws the colours of hope 

Hope 

red and light blue, sometimes golden and magenta, the colors of an experience to live only once in life, inbetween the trees of existence

the feather does not forget about desire 

Desire 

Desire to be seen, fully and utterly seen

desire to spend time, desire to caress, desire to plunge inside the bluest waters ever seen, those of your soul 

and sometimes the feather gets broken by the wind of reality 

Reality 

there is no future for truth, hope, or desire, there is only a now.

Now

The feather stopped on the tremble of your back 

Now does not seem to be enough. 

scarf

in the rain i will confess my tears

in the rain i will seize my hope

rain drop after rain drop 

my heart will wear a small scarf

to protect what needs healing

my mind is full of reasons 

to make me run in the rain.

October brackets

another october 

I realised my being 

can never be the same as in july

my soul became on brackets,

as intense and full this feeling

as it could be. 

this october, 

try to erase the brackets 

day by day. 

stars light

stars that argue before their God

am I real, or am I just sun dusk? 

stars that know my soul 

and sometimes bathe in it 

just to make it lighter 

stars that know their worth

and mine, never questioning it. 

stars that witness my duality 

my guilt and my passion

they sometimes smile

a woman made out of stars light, 

ours 

they say inbetween themselves.

my regret

goodbye I had hoped I would earn with no regrets

but was not possible 

actions can not be erased in the sand 

actions that offend, or that try to force 

no matter the reason, or the need behind 

no matter if I said sorry, no matter if I felt it 

still I regret it and most probably always will. 

esarfa

o esarfa mi se aseaza pe umeri

peste esarfa o tristete ca un kettlebell 

mult prea greu de ridicat.

o tristete pe care am evitat-o 

cu prea mult scris, 

cu un sens doar de mine inteles

o tristete pe care am tot dus-o la fundul paharului de cola cu rom 

dintr-o seara de toamna 

intr-un oras strain, 

in care te chemam inca, 

in care te asteptam inca. 

mi-ar fi placut ca peste esarfa mea sa se asterne furie, dar nu. 

e tristete si un inceput de dor. 

escaped words

so many words escaped my being 

to reach you 

shared my feelings, my truth and my reality through them

never expected reciprocity 

but never expected you not to be able to look inside my eyes ever again.

paintings in my imagination

painted a whole world from head to toe on your body

a lake where I could swim naked, was painted on your back

embraced silence and laughter as mountains and fire pit on your cheecks

light and darkness, sun and moon, on your tummy, both would have taken my small feet to protect, one from darkness, one from too much light. 

on your chest only a door I painted. 

A door to open when you miss me. 

resignation

there is a resignation of actions 

of words, especially written words

there is a resignation of emotions

that should have never been confessed 

there is a trembling heated fever 

in my body to bring at the departure gate 

no goodbye 

no dialogue, only monolog

no argument, only silence  

no emotion, not a confessed emotion

a strong pain in front of all of this resignations. 

warm stubborness

to caress the shoulders of your stubborness 

to warm its broken pieces

to lift it when it fells into sadness 

to tickle until it is able to let some parts of you free. 

dancing in the rain

dancing in the rain 

alone 

looking in your eyes from a distance 

knowing you will never dance with me 

still not able to pull my eyes away. 

dancing in the rain 

with a freedom I cherish 

that allows me to be as I am 

not good, but not bad 

beautiful when I dance 

passionate and rezilient 

dancing in the rain

if I would have fallen 

I know you would have caught me. 

vivid

I sent you a picture of my soul 

a woman soul 

full of contrasts 

of vivid emotions 

of hard and easy stains of life 

if you look close in the left part 

there is a door, behind that door there is the mark of your presence. 

playing with your smile

in my dream I played with 

the extreme corners of your mouth

when going for a smile

with your eyebrows when they get angry 

with your words just as they slide out

I played with your scent 

with the way you drink whisky 

with your hand that sometimes is shaking 

with the other one too. 

with your secrets and with your truths 

with the layers of your being, up to the moment you fell a sleep. 

with your stubberness was a pleasure to play, to quarell, to rezist her and her unrezist me. 

only for a second, in a dream. 

undesired emotion

emotion filled with an incredible warmth

let it disolve in the acid of silence

let it break into thousand pieces and shatter the earth.

fly to the highest mountain

undress its layers and stay naked there on top of the earth.

cry a name out of its core, 

cry it out as it should not be there.

can it carve it out? 

a simple name outside its emotional being, like a statement made to the gods, 

I shall not connect to this pole, this route again, this name I long to, this soul I feel. 

let it cut it out. Like a rose that is sick. 

let it make it hurt less.

or just bring upon itself acceptance of the wise, 

not passionate women or men. 

 

furla puzzle

one goodbye got lost in my furla bag

maybe the one that I was expecting the most 

usually I stack them next to my beautiful never expensive earings

I thought it appropiate for this goodbye to get lost in that particular bag

It is black and beautiful. It is simple and elegant. 

I looked for it for hours, up to the moment my bag was empty on the inside out. 

This particular goodbye was missing like a small puzzle piece to make me look for it, wait again. 

But life is not perfect. And some puzzles need to survive with a missing piece. 

graffiti de mujer

en las paredes de mi corazon 

esta escrito como un graffiti 

mujer 

que ve lo bueno

lo hermoso y la luz, ese luz incendida 

que tu alma esta cargando

y tambien ve la razon de que no puedes dejar atras la distancia. 

Tu miedo de no perder algo de ti.

rostro

mis lagrimas se pierden 

en los momentos de soledad 

mis lagrimas son sombras de tu 

perfume, de tu voz y de tu mirada

mis lagrimas se pierden en mi rostro 

para que nadie las vea 

unhealed faith

young and restless love 

still caresses the corners of my soul, 

painted in desire 

scratched by unhealed faith in your presence 

abis

patura in care emotiile danseaza pana la rasarit 

si capituleaza.

distance

the ability to let go 

strength to move on 

gratitude for the good times

forgiveness for other times

more than willpower 

closure 

and a deep internal faith in the ability to take decisions. 

distance is a matter of the soul 

a new journey is earned on how you own 

your goodbyes.

in lumina

in lumina 

o tandrete firava

cum sunt razele de soare chiar inainte de apus

o feminitate minunata si specifica

o feminitate tanara si totusi cu mii de layere mature 

o feminitate gingasa 

s-a nascut

o margareta alba 

un bujor alb foarte mic 

un trandafir rozaliu strain de restul trandafirilor 

in lumina toate s-au manifestat 

fara sa vrei si mai ales fara sa vreau. 

pui de bunica

mainile bunicii frematand in coca de cozonac 

mainile bunicii cosand povesti 

pe iile sufletelor nepoteilor mileniali

lasandu-le pe toate intr-o impletitura de paine proaspat coapta pe vatra. 

leganandu-si soldurile obosite 

se apleca din cand in cand in gradina sa smulga cate o buruiana 

pui pui pui striga uneori bunica, noi nestiind daca pe noi ne striga, sau puii de gaina.

Si asa ne asezam cu totii in jurul ei si ea scotea seminte din sort si dulciuri din buzunar. 

Paparudele lui bunica. 

mirror

there is a mirror or a shadow in silence 

i do not want to have to say it

i do not want to make it a reality 

i do not consider it is worthy of my answer 

i do not want to let go

i can not say

nothingness disguised in kindness.

generational

the sadness in my bones 

comes from

my mothers ankles 

to my grandmothers hands 

in her mothers legs

the sadness in my bones comes out in the morning

when the moon and the sun have only one moment to stair each other in the eyes. 

and the sun cries a bit as to say 

you never touched me,

but your light I feel inside. 

truth

i gave you space inside my heart 

i gave you faith and truth.

my loyalty and my words 

i gave you my time

i gave you a safe space 

i gave you confidence 

i gave you some doubts 

i gave you a small forever  

in my writings 

in my mind 

i gave you a piece of my soul, 

as you already could read it by instinct. 

question mark

I will always carry with me 

what you gave me

a question mark 

a mirror to always find the intelectual woman inside my soul

clarity and security

you gave me stairs to climb and watched me prove I can, always keeping my back

you gave me a safe space

a dream, a fantasy of sort

and without wanting or knowing 

you gave me the strength you gain only through vulnerability. 

as you are my vulnerability. 

un leon

estoy sonando de un leon

y este leon esta en mis manos 

en mis sentimientos 

en lo que estoy haciendo 

y dejo de hacer

y alomejor si esta con migo

siempre. Sin gritar. Sin decir nada. 

dor si mere verzi

o mana de mere verzi 

intr-o dup-amiaza de toamna 

copaci cunoscuti si straini

care imi leagana vantul 

dintre ceea ce sunt si ceea ce reusesc sa manifest. 

un dor linistit, un dor ce asteapta 

un dor pe care il tin ca pe un animal de casa 

il mangai din cand in cand 

e un dor pe care il iubesc 

un dor pe care din cand in cand il cert, 

un dor care ma face sa scriu si sa iti scriu

un dor pe care il dobor ca la bowling, 

cu un mar aruncat pe pista lucrurilor importante, care mi se aduna la mijlocul unui anotimp. 

 

iubire. compasiune. loialitate. dor. 

toate dor uneori. 

smashed

smashed goodbye, 

like a cottage cheese layered on a bread toast 

build on a high dosage of desolated emotion like a hard cheese that lost its purpose and taste

build on a huge amount of

silence 

that says it all if you are far enough