7 gestures

I remember few days after those 

7 minutes. 

Just waiting. 

I remember weeks after those 7 minutes. 

Sometimes texting in conversation with emoticons.

A little bit ashamed. A little bit weak. A little bit too blonde and too vulnerable. 

A little bit too much, but my heart did not know how to release. 

I remember I wanted to take back those 7 minutes. 

I remember I did not like myself for wanting to take back something I felt. 

I remember I did not understand. 

So much distance in between what I felt and what was to be felt - absence. 

Absence I got used to at one point. 

And then Absence dissappeared. 

And things got almost normal. 

but normal I don't do it seems. 

I would love to do normal, 

but it seems I just don't do. 

I do gestures. 

and I do what I feel. 

in the last week of the year

a gesture came from my heart. 

a misplaced gesture

not suited and unwanted

gesture with no goal.